Marriage Builders
of Lake County
Working together to build
happy marriages for life!

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Introducing "Marriage Builders of Lake County"…

A News-Sun article published in March of 1997 captured the attention of several Waukegan area ministers. The piece told of the Marriage Savers Institute^® founded by Mike McManus, whose column, Ethics & Religion, appears in about one hundred newspapers. In his book, Marriage Savers, McManus tells how he has guided scores of clergy in many communities to agree to a common marriage policy which will greatly enhance a couple’s chance of a stable marriage and slash the divorce rate by 30-40%. Perceiving the inestimable value of such a program in our community, Marriage Builders of Lake County was born. Drawing from the experience of scores of communities which have set successful policies in place, we have drafted the Lake County Marriage Covenant. Anyone in Lake County who is authorized to perform marriages is encouraged to join our ranks. With united prayer for the Lord’s guidance we will work to fulfill Mike McManus’ motto: "What God has joined together, let the church help keep together."

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Marriage Builders of Lake County Steering Committee:

Coordinator:
Mrs. Kelsie Newbrough
Marriage Ministry Coordinator
Lakeshore Tabernacle
jknubro@aol.com

Treasurer:
Rev. Glenn Stewart
Agape Christian Fellowship

Secretary/Webmaster:
Rev. Robert Rhyne
GraceLife Church
robertrhyne@hotmail.com

Rev. Paul Cull, retired
St. Dismas Catholic Church

Rev. Mitchell Dowell
First Southern Baptist Church

Rev. David Eikenberry
First Presbyterian Church

Rev. Cel Guzman
Apostolic Assembly

Rev. Charles Hofflander, retired
Full Gospel Tabernacle

Bob & Helen Pimpo
Chicago City Ministry Directors
FamilyLife Ministries

Deacon Bob Powers
St. Anastasia Parish

Rev. Harry Stackhouse
Sign of the Dove Church

Marriage Builders Materials are available at the offices of
Cornerstone Community Church
9am - 1pm Monday - Thursday
1390 North Greenbay Road
Waukegan, IL 60085
(847) 244-3007

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Is your congregation a Marriage Builder
with less than a 10% divorce rate?

It could be.

Consider adopting the

Lake County Community Marriage Covenant

• Upwards of 100 metro areas across the country have committed to instituting community marriage policies such as the one we’re proposing for Lake County (see attached). The idea of using such marriage policies is described in the book Marriage Savers, by Mike McManus (published by Zondervan), syndicated columnist and President of the Marriage Savers Institute. Communities are adapting and adopting resources outlined by Mr. McManus which provide proven ways your congregation can help couples accomplish six great goals:

Avoid a bad marriage before it begins

• by requiring couples to take a premarital inventory that can predict with 80% accuracy who will divorce. Result: 10% of couples, those in weak relationships, break their engagements.

Give "marriage insurance" to the engaged

• by offering mentoring by older couples with solid marriages.

Strengthen any existing marriage.

• Marriage Encounter, according to 60 studies, prompts eight out of ten couples to fall back in love and gain key communication skills. The policy does not try to keep couples trapped in bad marriages, but rather to turn bad marriages into good ones.

Save 90% of the most troubled marriages.

• In one church, seven couples whose marriages had once nearly failed, met with 40 couples headed for divorce over a decade, and restored 38 of them—a 95% success rate.

Spark reconciliation of the separated,

• saving more than half of their marriages.

Push down Lake County’s area divorce rate by 40%

• by creating a Community Marriage Policy to implement these programs in every congregation. If it is as successful as Modesto, CA, pastors have been, (as reported February 13, 1997 on 48 Hours, on the ABC Evening News with Peter Jennings, in The Washington Post by William Raspberry) – this area could save hundreds of marriages a year now ending in divorce.

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Lake County Marriage Covenant

* The Lake County Marriage Covenant has been certified by Marriage Savers Inc., which has established over 100 such agreements throughout the U.S. For more information phone 301-469-5870, or visit www.marriagesavers.com

Preamble

Our concern as clergy is to foster lasting marital unions under God and establish successful spiritual families. Nearly 75 percent of all marriages are performed by clergy, and we are troubled by the more than 50 percent divorce rate. Our objective is to reduce the divorce rate among those married in Lake County.

Clergy have a responsibility to raise the quality of commitment in those we marry. There is abundant evidence that couples who seriously participate in pre-marital counseling will have a better understanding of what the institution of marriage involves. As servants of God, we feel it is our responsibility to encourage couples to set aside time for marriage preparation, for it is more important to prepare for marriage than it is to prepare for a wedding.

We also believe that the faith communities have an ongoing responsibility to strengthen existing marriages and to save deeply troubled ones. As Malachi 2:14-16 states: "‘I hate divorce,’ says the LORD God of Israel." Therefore we adopt the following minimal policies, understanding that each congregation may have additional standards.

Marriage Covenant

1. We will encourage teens and single adults to practice sexual abstinence outside of marriage (possibly by encouraging them to sign a "True Love Waits" pledge).
2. We will offer relationship instruction to seriously dating couples.
3. We will require a minimum of four months marriage preparation.
4. We will require counseling sessions (six are recommended), with two devoted to the use of a pre-marital inventory, and others devoted to the substantive problems of finances, sex, communication, and conflict resolution.
5. We will train mature, married couples to serve as mentors to work with seriously dating, engaged couples, and newlyweds on a couple-to-couple basis. (This should include training of mentoring couples whose own marriages once nearly failed to work with currently troubled marriages.)
6. We will encourage engaged couples to attend a seminar such as "Engaged Encounter" or a para-church function that promotes healthy relationships and a God-centered marriage.
7. We will offer two post-marital counseling sessions with clergy or a mentor couple, six months and a year after the wedding date.
8. We will encourage all married couples to attend a couple’s retreat such as Marriage Encounter, Festival of Marriage, or Marriage Enrichment. (The married clergy should be the first to attend a couple’s retreat.)
9. We will participate and cooperate fully to learn and experience more about how to help couples bond for life.

Send e-mail to Rev. Robert Rhyne, Secretary

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• A Plea to Churches for Financial Support

   

  Dear Fellow Pastors,

  I am writing on behalf of the Marriage Builders of Lake County to solicit your financial help. We as an organization have no financial base except for interested and involved churches or ministries like yours. We are in need of financial support :

  1. To incorporate Marriage Builders as a non-profit charitable organization
  2. To print and distribute literature about our vision
  3. To sponsor training seminars to equip pastors and mentors for helping engaged and married couples build lasting, satisfying unions
  4. And we hope, in the near future, to have grown to the point of needing part-time, staff person support

  We are requesting that you prayerfully consider a monthly or yearly donation to Marriage Builders of Lake County.

  We appreciate your support as we work together to reverse the rising divorce rate and build strong marriages in our community.

  In His service,

  Pastor Glenn Stewart,

  Treasurer for Marriage Builders of Lake County

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Visit also
www.marriagesavers.com
www.familylife.com
Counseling Cohabiting Couples